Poem Testimony of a Heartbroken Girl

Testimony of a Heartbroken Girl

by RicaKay

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People say, "Love can make you crazy",

make you act more like a fool than a lady,

For years I said oh no not me,

hoopin and hollerin, snoopin followin'

THAT will never be me,

Then I met a man who swept me of my feet,

dropped all my guards, for once I felt free,

I found somebody who let me just be me.

For a while, we consumed one another's time,

it wasn't about nothing, if it wasn't he and I.

he earned his stripes, yes he had all my trust.

I felt secure in the foundation we had made for us,

But then with no warning, things started to change.

The sunshine we once basked in quickly turned to rain.

The man who was so open and would tell me everything,

became so distant, things weren't what they seemed.

I had dropped my guards, I felt so vulnerable.

The things I used to protect me for years, they no longer worked.

I was wide open, I damn near needed his love,

made me insecure, out the window went our trust.

I needed reasons, why my friend had changed,

how could a love so strong suddenly turn to pain.

So I stepped outside myself, violated his privacy,

and as soon as I started looking, I started finding things.

I confronted him about the infidelity,

and he ended up making ME feel like a lie, a cheat.

Lowest point in my life, I wanted to be this man's wife,

and he assured me I would be, then took it away from me.

The hurt made me question everything, made me live in suspense,

I lost some of my self love ,my self confidence,

couldn't eat, couldn't sleep, couldn't work, couldn't think,

couldn't keep my eyes dry, all I could do was just cry.

I'm grateful that I had friends and family there to hold me,

because for the first time in my life I could not console me,

I had to fall to my knees and pray, I had a to talk to God so many times a day,

I just wanted the pain to go away, but in reality I needed it to stay.

I needed to live in it for just a little bit longer, because that pain, that rain,

it all helped me grow, made me stronger,

It taught me some important lessons about life and love,

turned me into a woman, showed me the truth about us.

See he was a season, here to teach me things,

but he had to leave as surely Fall turns into Spring.

I have received what I needed from that situation,

now I need to be open for the next opportunity for education,

And as soon as I was able to let that go,

God unleashed his blessing, in abundance and overflow.

I'm shortening my journey, trust me it wasn't easy,

I had to forgive someone who lied and deceived me,

I had to get past anger, at the world, at him, at me,

it was hard but I knew it was the only way I could be free.

How can you find what really out there for you,

if you're holding onto what you USED to have and the things you USED to do?

So I thought I'd share my testimony,

you don't have to stay broken, you can grow through your rain.

You can flourish through the heartache, learn a lesson through your pain.